Blue Hour - 11/23/15

biting back screams
and burning up dreams
like if I just grit my teeth
until my skin comes clean,
falling off my bones
like melodies
falling off strings,
I'll find some zone
of stablity,
retracing butterfly arcs
that will step me
through anything

I can walk through fire

Primordial Black Holes - 08/05/15

all the unseen things
holding us together
like galaxies tethered
by strands of
Dark Matter
do not pass my Detection
despite weak interactions

Glueballs - 08/05/15

quartic interactions
strongly coupled
confined to this
white space
of heartbreak
asymptotically diverging
further away
pulling me
back to you

Pole - 04/07/15

A residue of panic
like sweat stepping
into a cool room;
like music
from down the hall,
with a bass line
shamed by your heartbeat.

weak interaction - 03/19/15

heavy eye lids
are hard to open

heavy lips
are hard to speak with

heavy limbs don't want
to leave bed

heavy particles
mediate this
weak interaction

won't you break me down
into something
light enough
to just

drift away?

Resonance Frequency - 03/14/15

Just leave the pieces lying there.
I wouldn't want to hurt
a single hair
if you tried to rearrange
the splintered shards
that have disengaged
from this week
and began to seek
the state of lowest energy.
They've already sunk
too far into apathy
and won't be drawn out
by soliloquy.
But that's okay because
it doesn't take that much
to shatter me.
Apparently
I've got an all-too-common
resonance frequency.

NMR - 02/22/15

I could be dancing dancing dancing
like an unpaired proton precessing
I could be positive
I could be free
I could be singing singing singing
like the world itself is ringing
in perfect resonance with me
I could be decaying
into anything
but me

Hope Is The Hardest Thing To Kill - 02/22/15

Transparency
looks just fine on me
as just another thing
that you can't see

That light in my eyes
had better quickly die
so I can realize that
I'm the only one who thinks
that time is standing still
because hope is the hardest thing to kill

Maybe this skipping beat
will learn to retreat
after I face defeat
at the hands of my latest rejection
I'll pretend to sleep
and get through this week
after another failed connection

A passing smile
is all it takes
to make me wish
my ricochet heart
would learn to chill
but hope is the hardest thing to kill

Just tell me, tell me,
are you looking for me
or some cheaper thrill,
because hope is the hardest thing to kill

A Lesson In Cosmology - 12/04/14

You are so incredibly
small.
One in seven billion people
on a planet that is
one in nine orbiting
a sun that is
one in 400 billion stars
in a galaxy that is
one in 100 billion galaxies
in the universe that
is all
of everything.
Infinitely big
that makes you look so
infinitely small.
And the same is true
of everyone you meet.
Your cosmic insignificance,
your fear, and your pain
are shared
by every other being
in existence.
You and I are so incredibly
small.

You are so incredibly
huge.
You are one made of
100 trillion cells
made of
70 trillion atoms
made of protons, neutrons, and electrons,
made of quarks and gluons,
made of light an energy,
made of singularities,
down to the smallest limit.
You are 7 billion people,
you are 9 planets,
you are 400 billion stars,
you are 100 billion galaxies,
you are a universe
that is all
of everything.
Infinitely small
that makes you look so
infinitely big.
And the same is true
of everyone you meet.
Your cosmic significance ,
your pride, and your purpose
are shared
by ever other being.
You and I are so incredibly
big.

Real - 12/03/14

Tell me something I don't know
and sow a seed
of curiosity
that blooms divergently,
with no natural number
such that all subsequent
fall inside of an epsilon neighborhood.

Tell me something I don't know
about the intricacies
of continuity
and how to prove conclusively
when a sequence converges
to an element of the domain
and the function does the same.

Tell me something I don't know
and, soon enough, I will.

Tell me something I've always known,
something I've grown up using,
and accepting,
never expecting to have it
called into question
while reflecting on what
we'll consider axiomatic
and what we'll demand a proof of.

Tell me something I've always known
and throw away one of the premises
to watch how the truth
changes with changing mathematics
and, while you're at it,
reality changes too.

Tell me something I've always known
and let me prove it.

and you leave such an awful taste - 07/29/14

At first I thought
I didn't like
dark chocolate
and
black coffee
because they're
bitter.

Then I remembered
I like you.

Library Trip - 07/25/14

The book you're looking for
is always going to be
on the bottom shelf
with the call numbers
on the front cover instead
of the spine
because
fuck you
that's why.

The people you consider
your best friends
are going to hurt you
in ways
your sadistic fictions
never prepared you for
because they can only
hurt you if you love them
and you love them.

Gnat - 07/23/14

I want to die
like the gnat that flew
into my ice cream

-

guilty,
regretful,
pained,

and so ecstatic
anyway.

Renormalization Group Equations - 07/22/14

Run these couplings
up and beyond
the Planck scale
where the gravity
of the situation
may finally
distort your solutions
and force you
to take another look:

just because
you have the capacity
to crush,
to obliterate,
to decimate
each quanta of joy
I find,
doesn't mean
I must listen.

Quantum field theory
and I
are inadequate at this scale,
so pardon me
if I fall back
to another.

Blood, GUTs, Glory - 07/17/14

No direct product
of groups
will give any
unification
of these disjoint hearts,
no matter
how many new quanta
of thought
you add.
There is no representation
that fits
every sigh and lie
and hope
fizzing through
neurons
during all the songs
that remind me
of you.