I superglued my fingers together so I wouldn't be tempted to text you - 07/11/16

slow dancing
and stargazing
and all the shit we’ll never do again
and never did at all
still sits heavy in my mind,
silhouetted with light of memories.
where are they now?
how have the morphed,
twisted by treason,
disfomed by dismay
and disaster
and dissonance?
crashed and captive in
"what if"s
and fantasies
of drowsily brushing my teeth next
to you.

dance it away or some shit - 07/09/16

tears swelling like gin
behind my eyes
on the sweaty, dark dance floor,
light falling on smoke,
rainbow balloons hovering
above my head,
singing or screaming
"I wanna dance with somebody"
and thinking that somebody was
you
and thinking about the night here with
you
and your soft, red hair
and your torn stockings
and your garters
and your red lipstick smeared everywhere
except for two cartoonish lips
on my cheek and the back of my hand
and thinking of
your hands in mine
your hands in my hair

thank god
the song ended
before I let
any more tears fall over you

only a broken heart - 07/07/16

For how many months
after the fact
am I going to keep
finding cracks
in the chalice
left by your
carelessness?
Good thing it's just
a metaphor,
because this heart
would leak
every drop of blood.