Graph Paper - 12/01/13

I've heard tale
of lives
that fit inside
of neat blue lines
on graph paper,
flowing like poems
that actually rhyme,
and, from time to time,
I tried to stay confined.
But I don't grow like
differentiable functions;
I grow like vines.
I grow intertwined
with other
not so tidy lives
that hopefully
aren't too eager
to leave mine. 

How Are You? - 11/26/13

If the sky is full of emptiness
is it really even full?
And if not,
can't you think of a better
description of its emptiness
than "full?"

"So focus on the stars!"
And the star dust?
That fraction of infinity?
That 5% of matter?
I am that star dust
and I want something more.

Feynman Diagram - 11/13/13

Color me potential.
Highlight paths
that sprawl away
from the interaction
of the present.
Shade each outcome;
cool colors for low days
and warm colors for low days
where I still have the momentum
to smile
and colorless confinement
for nights
when I fall on your floor,
close my eyes,
and interject parables
and physics equations
into your day-to-day life.

Sure,

there's some finite possibility,
but here's how I see it.

Covenant - 11/113/13

Pass me through
this bisected flesh,
this disjoint bone,
these severed arteries,
split infinitives,
bloodless muscle
over bloodied soil.
Bear these words
before mountain and sea,
before Heaven and Earth,
eternal to my
fleeting soul,
fleeting to the sky's
eternal emptiness,
and should I stray
from this oath,
cut a covenant from me.

Eigenvalue Equation 10/24/13

Your soul must contain
the Identity operator
because you're an
Eigenfunction
of every heart that's
ever operated on you:
you take something
but Remain unchanged.
I can know you
and anything else
to Arbitrary precision.

Degradation Ceremony - 10/23/13

Wipe away the smudged make-up
that I ruined
before I ever applied it;
cast aside
clinking jewelry
crafted from discarded mementos;
strip;
peel back flushed skin;
scoop away viscera,
my liver poured out on the ground;
knot veins,
burn bones,
break heart and lungs;
penetrate cells,
shake off electron shells,
split protons down
to the jeweled quarks and gluons.

Then put me all back together
with a poem
and your favorite song
and your anecdotes about
your cousin
and your repeated
adventure stories
and your bitter rants
and your blushed cheeks
and parables about
physics equations.

Consistent Field - 10/22/13

The effective energy
from your presence
perturbs this system
beyond analytic solution,
computational approximation,
any sort of tidy answer
that I can pluck
from this situation
and apply to another.
I've made estimations
based on every single
previous confrontation,
yet the next never
coheres to my models.

Bottom Quark - 10/21/13

Bare beauty
like the fields between people
blinking out of sight
in the cross hairs
of our gaze;

what particles
transmit our
conversations
and shared glances?

with what metals
would you sculpt
the solutions to their
transcendental equations?

Adiabatic - 10/20/13

Not a brush of skin,
not a hint of sin,
get nothing out,
put nothing in,
better begin
to retreat,
keep your seat:
there hasn't
been any
transfer of heat,
not the slightest
insight
to your condition,
no disturbance
to your momentum
or position.
Suppose it was
just a rehearsal,
but it still
ended up
irreversible.

There Have Been Times - 10/19/13

You should know
that there have been times
in my life
where I didn't want to
run and hide
when confronted with conflict,
when I haven't licked back tears
and kick back fears
to be calm and collect.
There have been times
when I have been loyal
but not to a fault,
when I have been polite
but not to a fault,
when I have been quiet
but not to a fault.
There have been times
when I have scream.
It's true,
I can be loud, too.
And I can laugh,
really laugh,
not
whatever way you described it,
"held back."
There have been times
when I couldn't contain my smile
and when I wouldn't
hide my glares.
There have been times
when I have been unapologetic.

I know there have.
I just can't remember when.

Digital Realism and Unfinished Business - 10/19/13

Spiders
and the
BLUE SCREEN OF DEATH
have a special place
in the part of my mind
that obsesses,
contrives conspiracy theories
and researches
how Facebook orders my chat list.

So I should stop drinking
quad-shot mochas
and staring at flickering screens
and checking my phone.
But I should also stop riding
bikes without brakes
and going for walks at night
and avoiding my friends.
And should stop watching stories
and start writing them
but I want to know your story.
I want to hear your song.
I want to watch her and her soul mate
make eyes at each other
and smile
and reminisce.
Give me the answers
but don't make me
ask the questions.

I won't open that chat bubble
no matter how long
that green light is on.
I promise.
I'm trying.

Even I - 10/14/13

Even I can't fall in love with the moon in the sky,
even if I try,
not matter how I try.
I can't pull the stars out every night,
not with all my might,
no, not with all my might.
I can't turn a scream into a lullaby,
that would make you sigh,
that would make you cry.
I've got nothing up my sleeve,
nothing up my sleeve,
anymore.
I've got no more parables
to keep you warm,
to keep me warm.
Even I can't fall in love with the moon in the sky,
even if I try,
even when I try,
no matter how I try.

4am - 10/14/13

Bridges I've never crossed,
streets I've never passed,
people I've never spoken to
or will never get the chance to,
movies I've never seen,
poems I never wrote,
dreams I can't remember,

and nightmares that won't
leave me alone.

Sulfur - 10/14/13

The lilac sky
around midnight
tricks me into thinking
it's a fair time of day
to run away,
so when the lime lightning strikes,
I'm out of sight,
out of mind,
out of the line of fire.

Yes, I'll be far enough away
to taste the sulfur rain
on Venus.

Ordinary Ghost - 09/15/13

Hey, little wisp of smoke,
Hey, little spirit,
Hey, little transcendental passerby
Won't you tell me why
you're in this creaking house, why
you're in this gloomy room?
Why, little ghoul, oh why?
Shouldn't you be haunting
all the small things?
Shouldn't you be with
the Pumpkin King?
Shouldn't you, little spirit?
Shouldn't you, little spirit?
Oh, shouldn't you buzz,
little fly?

But you're an ordinary ghost
in this damn dark world
and you've been left behind
by all the vampires
who don't care if you're alright

But you're a quiet, little ghoul
in this deafening world
who's nothing beside
all the banshees
shrieking tonight

They're gonna tell you that
"Good little ghosts
don't go no where,
cuz you're only as loud
and the screams you snare."

Who are you haunting tonight?
I say,
who are you haunting tonight?
Little ghoul,
who is on your mind?
Who do you wish
wasn't afraid of the night?

They're gonna tell you that
"Good little ghosts
don't go no where,
cuz you're only as loud
and the screams you snare.
Good little girls
had better beware
of the darkness
lurking everywhere."
And if you try to ask
when the darkness persists,
those monsters will try
to feed you some bullshit
about how shadows are caused
by your light,
when you're the only thing
even close
to right.

But you're an ordinary ghost
in this damn dark world
and you've been left behind
by all the vampires
who don't care if you're alright

But you're a quiet, little ghoul
in this deafening world
who's nothing beside
all the banshees
shrieking tonight

Oh, little ghoul,
I promise I care
Oh, little ghoul,
I know it's tough out there
And, baby, I swear
You are scary
Oh, who is haunting you tonight?